Parents, Kids, & Teenagers

Then the tears started flowing…

Written by: Nick Ortner

A few weeks back, I found myself looking through a website late at night, with gentle tears flowing down my face.

Let me explain what happened…

I’ve recently written and released my first children’s book, “The Big Book of Hugs: A Barkley The Bear Story”. The book came about in large part because of the birth of our first child, my daughter June. Born May 16th, 2015, her entry into my life opened up a whole new world for me. And with it, came this yearning to share positive messages of hope and healing with children throughout the world.

I thought of “Barkley” a young bear cub whose family business is to go through the forest giving different kinds of hugs to the animals in it, and enlisted my sister-in-law, an amazing 2nd grade teacher, Alison Taylor, to co-write the book with me. Then we needed an illustrator, and lo and behold, Michelle Polizzi, the wife of my best friend, jumped on board to illustrate the book.

Through all these beautiful connections, “The Big Book of Hugs” was born. It’s currently in printing and due to ship on January 21st, National Hug Day! (Another happy coincidence to be able to time it that way!)

To help spread the message of the book, I hired a publicist, who (yes, the happy coincidences keep piling up), lives in my hometown of Newtown, CT and who I met at a screening of our documentary, Project Light: From Rwanda to Newtown.

Rodi (the publicist) and I were chatting last week, and I told her how important it was to me to get this book in the hands of those that need it most. And she said, “Could you do a big donation to the Today Show Toy Drive?” I said absolutely, and we landed on donating 10,000 books, $170,000 worth of them, to the toy drive.

We worked it out with the Today Show, they were delighted with the message of the book and thought it was a great fit for the charities they support in the toy drive, and asked me to come on the show the following Friday to announce the donation.

All of this happened in quite a whirlwind, over a 24 hour period, and late that night, I jumped on the computer to learn more about the toy drive, and where these books would be going. What I read floored me…

But before I tell you about that, let me tell you about Barkley.

Barkley wakes up one morning in the forest, with his Mom and Dad calling out to him to wish him a happy birthday AND let him know he’s finally old enough to join the family business of giving hugs and spreading love through the forest.

At first, he’s a little nervous, “What if I can’t do the great job that Papa Bear does?” Not to worry, Papa Bear feels that way too, so he starts every morning with the first hug, hugging yourself! (Yes, we could ALL start the day with a little self love.

The book continues with Barkley and Papa Bear’s journey throughout the forest, as Papa Bear shows Barkley all the different kinds of hugs you can give, for different situations. The surprise hug! The tornado! The extra, extra, extra long hug! The pickle-in-the-middle! And of course, the Goodnight Bear hug!

Through his journey, Barkley learns to pay attention to what people need. He even learns what to do when an animal (Pete the Porcupine!) doesn’t want a hug! He learns confidence, empathy and the power of giving hugs and spreading love.

Back to my late night web browsing…So I’m clicking around the Today show toy drive page and I start reading about the destinations for these books….

You see, every 29 seconds, a child in the United States is born into poverty. That means limited access to food and medical care, and oftentimes even basic human services. For many of these children, there are NO gifts for the holidays. This is where the Today Show Toy Drive steps in.

The program is designed to provide gifts and essentials for impoverished children and teenagers up to age 18 nationwide. They’ve recently expanded the program to include gifts that children are able to give their parents, because giving provides joy in itself. (what a beautiful idea!)

These items go to millions of kids in all 50 states who are in places like homeless shelters, children’s group homes, schools, foster family services, domestic abuse shelters, Native American missions, military bases, hospitals, preschools, after-school programs, and the Boys and Girls Clubs of America.

As I’m reading about these kids, and these organizations who are helping them, the tears started flowing. I have lived a privileged life. Not without its challenges of course, but I’ve never gone hungry, I’ve never gone without gifts, I’ve never gone without incredible love from my parents, family and those around me.

That’s not the case for a lot of these kids.

And as I imagined each one of them, at least 10,000 of them sitting down and reading or listening to “The Big Book of Hugs”, I just felt so grateful for the opportunity to help and play a small part in bringing some light into each of these lives.

When my co-author Alison, who I mentioned is a 2nd grade teacher, read the book to her class, they couldn’t wait for it to finish so they could give each other all the different kinds of hugs!

I imagined this same reaction in a homeless shelter. I imagined this same reaction in a children’s group home. I imagined this same reaction in a domestic abuse shelter. Where physical contact could start to mean something GOOD and POSITIVE and HEALING, not what it’s meant for way too many of these kids.

I think we take the power of a hug for granted.

I think we take the power of compassion, of opening our hearts, of healing for granted.

As much as we need to provide for the basic needs of these incredible kids, we also need to provide for their emotional needs. They NEED hugs. They CRAVE hugs. They DESERVE hugs. And our friend Barkley is leading the way in making that happen.

So in the start of this New Year, I hope you hug those around you, squeeze them a little tighter, hold them a little longer. I can’t wait for these 10,000 books to find a deserving home, and I’m not stopping there. If you pick up a copy today of “The Big Book of Hugs”, I’ll match one for one (buy ten, I’ll match ten!), and donate it to reach even more kids.

My goal is to donate another 10,000 books during this holiday season and the book’s official launch on January 21st, National Hug Day. Together, let’s continue to share this message of hope and healing.

Sending you a big HUG!

Nick Ortner

P.S. As an interesting side-note to this story, I’m writing it right around the time I was scheduled to be LIVE on air, on the Today show. They called yesterday and said they were overbooked, so they couldn’t have me on the show. I was disappointed of course because I wanted to introduce Barkley to the world on national television, but I understand the constraints of TV time.

What I found most amusing is when they said, “Of course, we’ll understand if you decide to pull the donation because we can’t have you on.”

Pull the donation? Because I’m not going to be on TV? Isn’t the whole POINT of this toy drive THE DONATION? Lol. I know they were just trying to be nice in coming with disappointing news, but I remain SO grateful to them for the amazing work they’re doing with the toy drive, and the real gift they’ve given ME this holiday season!

Pick up a copy today and let’s get some more hugs out there! www.barkleythebear.com/hugs
P.P.S. When you order the book today, I’ll also throw in a couple of great Tapping meditations, as a bonus gift to you. They include:

Let Go of Overthinking: A Guided Tapping Meditation

Overcoming Exhaustion: A Guided Tapping Mediation to Help you Feel More Energized –

Create Peace in the World: A Guided Tapping Meditation

Simply send your receipt to barkley@thetappingsolution.com and we’ll get those bonuses right over to you. 🙂



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