Parents, Kids, & Teenagers

Do Your Kids Have School Anxiety?

Written by: Nick Ortner

A few years back, my brother Alex had an experience that would greatly influence our direction with Tapping. It was so profound because it was something we ALL could relate to at some point in our young lives.

I’ll let Alex tell the story in his own words…

I remember sitting on the couch with my wife Karen, having finally gotten our three young kids to bed, and saying to her, “Nobody told us that it would be like this!” We were heartbroken about a conversation we’d just had with our oldest son Malakai…

After our two younger ones, Lucas and Olivia, were asleep, we’d had a conversation with Malakai, 6 years old at the time, where he’d told us that he was nervous and scared every day at dismissal about missing the bus.

The chaos of everyone getting their things together, along with the muffled sounds of the buses being called over the loudspeaker, was putting him into a panicked state every day.

As parents, we have a constant desire to protect our kids, to keep them safe, healthy and happy. But the reality of life makes this impossible, and thus keeps our nervous systems — to put it mildly — on edge. 🙂

So what do we do when our child comes home anxious about missing the bus, or upset about being left out of a game at recess, or nervous about doing poorly on a test, or any of the dozens of other events that can happen to upset our child and throw off their confidence, happiness, and ability to learn and grow?

There is one simple technique that I have found to be instrumental in rebalancing my children, and those whom I’ve shared this with, that has been scientifically proven to work… and that’s Tapping!

The reality is that our children are under more pressure and stress than ever before (as are we as adults!). The childhoods we remember… are not the same as the childhoods our children are currently experiencing.

This means that we as parents have a bigger responsibility than ever before to be there to help them as they move through the emotional landscape of growing up.

After listening to Malakai tell us about his end of day anxiety about possibly missing his bus, we knew that doing some Tapping would help. We asked him if he’d be willing to do the Tapping with us and he said yes!

We went through the Tapping process, focusing on how he was feeling every day at school during dismissal, and Tapping on each of the points he’d learned from the Gorilla Thumps and Bear Hugs book.

By the end of the process, he felt much better, and there was a clear difference in how he looked and talked about the dismissal. He went to bed easily after the Tapping and after that night, we gave it a few days before we brought it up again.

But one day after school as I walked him back from the bus stop, I asked him, “How’s dismissal going? Are you still nervous about it every day?” His response was just a shrug and a, “No, it doesn’t bother me anymore.”

SUCCESS!! With just a few minutes of Tapping, he released the stress and anxiety he dealt with every day since the dismissal.

I emailed his teacher that night, who was also keenly aware of his stress about the end of day routine. She confirmed that he was completely differently over the last few days.

These simple, yet extremely powerful shifts in our children’s experience, can be life-altering. Think about your own childhood for a minute… are there some negative emotions or experiences you wish you could have resolved from your childhood? I’d love to read your comments below.

Stress Relief for Children

One of the things I’m most proud of in sharing Tapping with the world is that we’re not just talking theory or solely doing things online – it’s actually getting Tapping to the places that matter!

And one of the best places to share Tapping is in schools, with kids who need it the most…

Watch that happen before your eyes in this powerful video:

Gorilla Thumps and Bear Hugs Book

Gorilla Thumps and Bear HugsAnother place that matters is your own home. So be sure to pick up a copy of my brother Alex’s Tapping for kids book, “Gorilla Thumps and Bear Hugs: A Tapping Solution Children’s Story”.

It’s great for bedtime reading and even has a Tapping exercise in the back to help your kids go to sleep. 🙂

Learn more here.

Amazon Reviews:
5 out of 5 stars: I love love love this book
I love love love this book. I have just started learning about Tapping and thought What a great idea to teach my 9-year-old to do it too. The book was a hit with her. She loved the story and animations as well. It made it so easy for her to learn how to Tap. I highly recommend it for every age level even adults. 🙂

5 out of 5 stars: Yes the little boy I purchased it for loves reading…
Yes, the little boy I purchased it for loves reading it and does the tapping along with it…his mother has found him reading quietly by himself a number of times. He is only four years old!!!

5 out of 5 stars: This is a great book for teaching the whole family relaxation and self…
This is a great book for teaching the whole family relaxation and self-care tools. With several pages of specific applications at the end. My 6-year old nephew got it for Christmas (from me:) and the whole family enjoys practicing Gorilla Thumps and Bear Hugs! So grateful for this book!

What negative experiences and events from your own childhood do you wish you could have eliminated? Comment below!

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17 Comments on this post

  1. Robbie says:

    My 12yr is suffering from stress related issues and adhd, he sure does need some tapping from time to time, he is been on and off with meds and was wondering if anyone has advice on focusing , or any good med recommendations, Straterra has worked the best but had to stop due to depression but he was not taking antidepressants at the time, adderall, riidalin and Vyansnes don’t work, I have researched online on site’s like – mayo clinic, reddit and, looking for some handy advice.

  2. Roseleen says:

    The stresses we accumulate in childhood carry through into our adults lives. It is my opinion that accumulated stress is the source of temptation to “do drugs”. in order to eliminate the pain.
    You are doing life saving work in these children’s lives.

    Transcendental Meditation works in some of the most troubled city schools to teach children how to meditate to eliminate stress accumulation.

    You are wise and generous to work with them. Sincerely, Roseleen Gaffney

  3. Darci says:

    I have no children, but have experience some releasing with tapping. I believe this should be taught in AlL schools. It is a marvelous way to
    help children clear their fears, anger and anxieties that are so prevalent
    in our world today.

  4. Wendy says:

    I am a horse riding teacher & a mother. So glad somebody is addressing this issue of handling emotions in an easy way.

  5. C. Overink says:

    I am grateful for all of your tapping wisdom! This idea of sharing it with our youngest generation is priceless ! Thank you for both your wisdom and your commitment to share your knowledge! It does make the world a better place and after all, isn’t that what a lot of us strive for ?

  6. Emerald @ says:

    How Amazing! I love this.

  7. Christina Missong says:

    Dear Nick, Jessica and Alex,
    I was just looking to your video and I’m very impressed and enthusiastic.
    We, my family and friends in Germany, are running a school project in Diani, Kenya for kids from very poor families.
    They were growing up with a lot of fear and punishment. And even if we have changed this inside our school this feelings are still there and sometimes the kids overcompensate in different ways.
    Do you have any experience in Africa? Perhaps you see a chance to help the kids in or project and in the neighborhood.
    Looking forward to hear from you Christina

    • Nick Ortner says:

      Hi Christina. Congratulations on the project you have begun in Kenya. We are thrilled to hear how you are helping children there. Although we don’t have any specific experience with projects in Africa, The Tapping Solution Foundation is working on how to get tapping into schools. The information they will be sharing may helpful for you no matter where you live. You can sign-up for more information here We wish you all the best! 🙂

  8. jean slocum says:

    in grade school. On the monkey bars. It was easy to sit on a bar and twirl around. Teaching a friend. She was sitting there, very stiff, I gave her a nudge. She fell. Cried. A teacher marched me off to the principal’s office. I was miserable because i hadn’t wanted to hurt her. Wanted to be with her and tell her I thought I was helping her.

  9. Susan says:

    I love what you are doing with children, it will change their lives and help transform the world. All of you do such wonderful work! I have very severe lifelong claustrophobia that I can trace back to a game I played as a child with my cousins. One person would pretend to be a wild animal and the others would throw a blanket over the person pretending, trapping them inside. I was terrified, but afraid to say I didn’t want to play the game. The claustrophobia is now so severe I can no longer fly on airplanes, and my entire family lives on the opposite coast. I am heartbroken. I would be so grateful if you would do a tapping video for claustrophobia. I know there are many others like me who suffer from this and it would help many of us to heal and improve our lives. Thank you for all you do!

  10. Barbara Edwards says:

    As a retired clinical social worker, with extensive experience working with children, the book sounds like an excellent way for children to resolve traumas at the time period in which they occur.

  11. Monte Van Vleet says:

    Alex, this is a beautiful clip. What you and the Tapping Solutions Foundation are doing for these children is truly a blessing. I wish this had been done in my elementary school 50 years ago; how different the world will be when this practice goes nationwide in our schools! My heart went out to the big kid who barely got his words out on camera, as I was a very big kid myself at his age, and I remember the negative input not only from other kids, but my own family as well. I would love to hear how tapping has helped him. All the best!

  12. Ronald says:

    Dear Nick,

    again and again I cannot say enough “thank you!!” for all the sharings and the work you do!! I can´t find words how life changing and healing this is…!
    I myself, being misused and violently treaten as a child, am facing now the effects and “footprints” of my childhood´s experiences, as I´m almost 50 now, as they are influencing in a restricive way my everyday steps, as well as the whole structure of my life… . – Anyway, those hardships have thought me a whole lot about life, and I regard life´s experiences never to be happening as “by chance” anymore.
    So even if I have nonetheless the desire that all the destruction I faced never had happened in my life, I know now that it is also the Soul´s Pattern of Evolutionary Desire, that pictures out as these “outer life circumstances”… – designed to wake us up and to move us into a new and higher level of Being Truly Ourselves … .
    Blessings to you and to your family, Nick!!


  13. Malathie says:

    Oh yes, I fully agree with you. All children must learn Tapping. It will empower them in today’s stressful world!

  14. Darcy says:

    I would love to see tapping in every school – it’s a vital need in our society. I only wish all principals placed as much emphasis as this one does on addressing the social/emotional needs of the students in her school, as no learning takes place unless these needs are addressed. Alex’s book looks wonderful and I hope he will be going on the road to schools throughout the country to spread the wisdom.

  15. Dan says:

    great post!

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