When you lose someone, a period for grieving is natural, and it should be honored, whether the loved one was a parent, a friend, or a pet. The grief of losing a pet is grief the world often calls small, but it deserves just as much space. Grief takes its own pace, and tapping is one way to make that weight a little more bearable while you carry it.
If you're looking for more peace with the grieving process, then I've got a tapping meditation just for you.
Releasing Grief
https://tappingsolution.s3.amazonaws.com/APP/Emotional-Freedom-Series/ReleasingGriefMusicV2.mp3
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This meditation is a sample from our Tapping Solution App that's available to download here.
I'm sharing this with you so that you can get a taste of what's available in the app, along with hundreds of other Tapping Meditations from a wide variety of categories.
What grief does in the body
Grief isn't only sadness. It shows up as exhaustion sleep doesn't fix, a tight chest, a foggy mind that forgets simple things, a stomach that won't settle. Your nervous system is registering a real loss as a real threat to your sense of safety. Tapping works on that layer directly, the stress response underneath the grief, not on making the loss itself disappear.
A gentle round for grief
This one is built to be soft. There's no target to hit and no pace to keep. Notice what's true for you right now and rate its intensity from 0 to 10 before you begin.
- Setup 1 (side of hand): "Even though this grief feels like more than I can carry today, I accept myself and how I feel."
- Setup 2 (side of hand): "Even though part of me doesn't want this to be real, I accept where I am right now."
- Setup 3 (side of hand): "Even though I don't know how to do this, I'm willing to be gentle with myself while I learn."
- Eyebrow: "This grief I'm carrying."
- Side of the Eye: "How much I miss them."
- Under the Eye: "This ache in my chest."
- Under the Nose: "I don't have to hold it together right now."
- Under the Mouth: "Whatever I feel today is allowed."
- Collarbone: "Letting my breath come, even with this here."
- Under the Arm: "I can carry this a little more gently."
- Top of the Head: "I'm allowed to move through this at my own pace."
Check your number again. Repeat as many times as you need, today or any day this comes back around.
Free. The best place to start.
Want to learn tapping from the people who know it best?
The Tapping World Summit has taught tapping to people all over the world since 2009. Ten days, 24 of the world's leading tapping teachers, 100% free.
Join the free summitPhrases for the hardest grief moments
| The moment | A phrase to try |
|---|---|
| Someone asks "how are you" and you don't know how to answer | "Even though I don't have a good answer for how I'm doing, I accept myself anyway." |
| You laugh, then feel guilty about it | "Even though I feel guilty for laughing today, I accept that grief and joy can both be true." |
| Grief you thought you'd worked through resurfaces | "Even though I thought I was past this, I accept that grief doesn't move in a straight line." |
| Exhaustion from grieving while still showing up for work or family | "Even though I'm running on empty, I accept myself for doing what I can today." |
What our data shows
Inside The Tapping Solution App, our Releasing Grief session has been completed 71,023 times, with self-rated intensity dropping from 7.4 to 4.5 on average (session data, not a clinical trial). For a pet, our Grieving the Loss of a Pet Support session has been completed 13,452 times, moving from 7.8 to 5.2. Both live inside our wider Emotional Freedom category: 58 sessions, over 4 million completions, averaging 7.0 to 4.1.
Grief-specific research on tapping is still thin. Most of what we know comes from the broader stress and anxiety research and from what people tell us after using the app.
A separate peer-reviewed study of 270,461 App users (Church & Stapleton, 2020, JMIR mHealth and uHealth) found a single guided tapping session brought anxiety down from 6.7 to 3.8 and stress down from 6.9 to 3.8, on average. Not grief-specific, but the anxiety and stress that ride alongside grief respond to the same mechanism.
What people say
“What a Godsend… thank you, you earth angels Nick and Jessica, what a difference your way of Tapping has made for me.”
“This was perfect for my moment, shifting from feeling the weight of the sadness to embracing it. The heaviness lifted and I feel life flowing into me even with sadness here.”
A note on complicated or prolonged grief: most grief eases with time, even when it never fully disappears. If it's been many months with no shift at all, if you can't function day to day, or if you're having thoughts of self-harm, please reach out to a grief counselor or therapist, and if it's thoughts of self-harm, reach out to the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (call or text 988) first. Tapping can be a real support alongside that care, not a replacement for it.
I hope you enjoyed listening to this tapping meditation, and please help me spread the word about The Tapping Solution App!
If you want to go deeper on this in book form, my book The Tapping Solution is a good place to start.
Until next time,
Keep Tapping (On the app!)
Nick Ortner
- Instantly reduce anxiety and stress
- Fall asleep faster and sleep better
- Boost productivity, stay motivated
- Relieve chronic or occasional pain
- Release anger, find peace
Go deeper
- A fuller guide to tapping through grief, day by day: Grief Hurts.
- Grieving a pet specifically: tapping for the loss of a pet.
- When the feeling is more ordinary sadness than grief: tapping for sadness.
- More ways to word a round: EFT tapping phrases and EFT tapping scripts.
- See every point in the sequence: the 9 tapping points chart.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does tapping help with grief?
Many people find it does, though tapping doesn't take grief away. What it can do is calm the stress response that rides alongside grief, the racing heart, the tight chest, the flood of tears, so grief has more room to move instead of getting stuck. Our Releasing Grief session has been completed over 71,000 times, with intensity dropping from 7.4 to 4.5 on average.
What is the Releasing Grief session in the app?
It's a guided tapping meditation built specifically to sit with grief at your own pace, the one sampled at the top of this page. You can try the full session free in The Tapping Solution App.
How do I tap for grief on my own?
Name what's actually true right now, the sadness, the anger, the guilt, the numbness, and rate its intensity from 0 to 10. Tap through the points, naming that feeling at each one, then check your number again. The gentle round on this page is a good place to start.
Is it normal for grief to resurface months or years after a loss?
Yes. Grief doesn't move on a straight timeline. It often resurfaces around anniversaries, holidays, or an unrelated hard season. Tapping on the wave of feeling that shows up right now works the same way whether the loss happened last week or years ago.
Is it okay to tap on anger toward the person who died, or toward the situation?
Yes. Anger at the person, the illness, or the unfairness of it is a normal part of grief, not a betrayal of your love for them. Tapping on that anger gives it somewhere to go besides staying stuck in your body.
Is complicated or prolonged grief different, and should I still tap?
Grief that stays just as intense many months in, that keeps you from functioning day to day, or that comes with thoughts of self-harm is worth bringing to a grief counselor or therapist. Tapping is a support alongside that care, not a replacement for it.
Is there a free tapping session for grief?
Yes. The Releasing Grief meditation above is a free sample, and you can try the full session, along with our Grieving the Loss of a Pet Support session, free in the app.
